The Pleasure Agenda: Mirror Play
An Educational Series For Making Pleasure Your Favorite Habit
Mirror, Mirror on the wall who’s the sexiest, most worthy, most vibrant of them all? — that would be YOU!
We Read and We Don’t Judge
Confession time! —I used to make out with myself in the mirror. We read and we don’t judge! I’d put on my Lip Smackers gloss, sit on my bedroom floor in front of my mirror and have pretend conversations with my celebrity crush. I’d flirt with my reflection, cosplaying as “said person”, and eventually smear my fruity scented lip gloss all over the mirror and around my lips as I practiced smooching.
Among my frequent mirror make-out sessions, I’d also sit in front of the mirror and talk to myself, stare at myself, cry, practice movie scenes — or what I would have said to that person if I could have the conversation all over again. I would console myself, I would masturbate, I would dance, I would take pictures, I would sing, I would draw on it with lip stick or markers, I would create worlds and fantasies as I gazed at the person staring back at me.
Little did I know I was creating safety within myself. The parts of me that were self-conscious or “too much” or unacceptable to show in public, I shared with my mirror. The parts of me that were afraid or angry or sad or turned-on, found communion in my reflection. I could shut off the performance feature and just be.
1 Certification, 2 Certification, 3 Certification, Therapy…
It wasn’t till much later in my life that I realized what I experienced with my mirror was freedom. It was self-witnessing. It was a foundational component for my healing; to be able to face all parts of myself. To look at and admire all the parts of me that I loved, and gain the courage to pay attention to the parts of me that I didn’t. The parts I felt shame around — and not just physically. The parts that made me feel inferior or unattractive. The parts that diminished my confidence and tainted my worthiness. The parts that I compared to the acceptable and digestible standards of society.
My mirror has always been a sanctuary. I can’t say that for the mirrors out in the world. The ones you pass in the store, or that make up exteriors of buildings, the ones that look you up and down as you walk by, or smile in your face and spew projection or praise under their breath, the ones who take up space on your social media but don’t show up on your social media, and even the ones who love you in public and in private, the ones who lay next to you in the dark, in the peace and quiet of the night, along side the chaos in their mind.
These are all mirrors. Reflections. Offering us information. Inviting us to look back with love and curiosity instead of avoiding or stealing glances out of self-criticism, fear, unworthiness, and shame — albeit most of which is not of our own doing.
An Invitation to Look Back With Love and Curiosity
Mirror-Play is the beautiful art of seeing into oneself. The practice of looking at your reflection with reverence and love, enriches your self-worthiness and cultivates deep inner trust. Layering in a sensual and playful essence to this practice dissolves the separateness we often feel between our self-image, our bodies & our sexuality. Integration of these aspect of your being, to any self-love ceremony or ritual, enlivens your eroticism and becomes a permission slip to show up in every area of life, with unfuckwithable confidence.
6 Practices You Can Start… Right Now!
Gaze of Gratitude: Stand in front of the mirror, look deeply into your own eyes, and say, “I am grateful for you” or “I love you.” Hug yourself or place your hands on parts of your body that need extra care and attention. Take a few moments to really feel the words and embrace the love. This boosts emotional connection and self-worth.
Sexy Affirmations: Speak positive, empowering affirmations while looking at your reflection. Examples: “I am sexy AF,” “I ooze confidence,” or “My body loves and invites pleasure.” Make it spicy and playful by adjusting your tone and body language, maybe even caressing yourself to reinforce the affirmations.
Pleasure Ritual: Touch your body with love and reverence in front of the mirror. Start from your scalp, then move down your body, savoring each part. Express out loud with sound or breath how much you appreciate your physical form and the pleasure it gives you. Don’t shy away from your pleasure centers. Let yourself give over to what feels good, without shame, guilt or judgement. This connects your physical and sensual self by activating your parasympathetic system.
Sensual Dance: Put on your favorite sexy music and dance in front of the mirror. Watch your movements with curiosity and excitement. Let yourself move freely, and flirtatiously. Notice any turn-on and how your body feels. This somatic practice builds confidence and sensual awareness and can aid in releasing storage.
Positive Body Talk: Stand facing the mirror — preferably naked, and voice 5 things you love about your body while looking at your reflection. Instead of focusing on what you want to change, offer praise to what is amazing and unique about your body. You could also add a touch of humor or flirtation to make it more sexy and playful.
Visualize Your Thriving: Imagine your most confident, empowered, magnetic, erotic self and see that version of you in the mirror. Invite your senses for a more holistic experience: hear the confidence in your voice, feel the energy radiating from your body, and witness yourself owning every moment, etc. Do this practice daily to embody your highest potential.
Create A Sanctuary in Your Reflection
If you want to shine outwardly, you must first embody your shine from within. You must become your own permission slip for self-love, self-care, self-championing and empowerment. In a world where we experience performative…everything, creating a sanctuary in your reflection is the kindest, most loving and impactful option you have because it is the mirror you become for the world. If that feels too heavy a responsibility, that’s ok. Think about your partner, your family, your children, your friends, your social sphere. Consider the closest proximity and what beautiful and positive and loving impact you have on them, when you become a safe space, a nurturing space, a kind and compassionate and curious space. Think about yourself as a mirror for them to look back at. What will they see? What will you see?
I hope you make a sanctuary in your reflection.
Get More Than Just Turned-On With Mirror-Play
If you want to step into Mirror-Play, in a guided way, I’ve got some sexy and free for you! GET MY FREEBIE!
I'm Brianna Endrina, mentor for women and lovers in coupledom. A sort of mating n' relating connoisseur, if you will. I'm here to guide you — and your boo, towards confident eroticism & nourishing partnership!
It’s not just about sex, it’s about sex worth having! It’s about sustainability and passion. It’s about deeply connected, honest intimacy. It’s about learning be fully expressed, safely loved and well-f*cked for yourself and with each other.
It’s time to ditch the old narrative and step into a life of turn on! Get pleasure, encouragement, accountability and all the sexy empowerment at your fingertips! Get on-demand coaching with me through Pocket Pleasure! No more settling, you deserve EPIC!
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Urg. The delight, healing and power of mirror play!!! Thank you for sharing this magic 👏👏